Robin Clark | Bay Area Coach & Photographer for Women » Coach & Photographer for Women

Are You Becoming More Skilled & Savvy at Living Your Life?


How’s week 1 of this Mercury retrograde treating you? (Not sure what that is? I wrote about it last week, read it here.)

What are you learning? What happened that you weren’t expecting? Where are you being inspired to become more refined, more skilled, more savvy at living your life?

It’s about being honest with yourself

You have goals you want to realize, dreams you want to make reality. And in different ways you’re cracking away at it every day. Awesome.

But to get there, you have to become a version of you who is a match for those goals and dreams manifesting. It takes some work, some experimenting with doing things in a new way, some rearranging how you think about things, some cleaning things up, some patience. All of which begins with being honest with yourself about where you’re currently at, internally and externally.

For example, there’s the old, uncomfortable emotions in you. Fear. Sadness. Poor me. Helplessness. Anger. Shame.

And then there’s how these uncomfortable emotions (likely unconsciously) play themselves out in your life. Laziness. Addictions. Blame. Self-defeating beliefs. Avoidance. Complaining. Being undisciplined. Leaving things incomplete. Drama. Obsessions. Self-judgment. Repressed creativity. Etc.

To move forward, to be a match for your goals and dreams, you’re going to have to move through and clear out at least some of how this stuff is showing up for you now. Yet life is filled with so much grace, this clearing is probably already happening. If you were to look at just the last week of your life, isn’t it apparent that life has been pointing out where you’ve got a bottle neck inside you… as well as whispering to you the mean to open it?

The more fearless you are in your self-inquiry, the more fearless you can be in how you show for your life.

5 Ways to become move skilled & savvy in how you’re going about your life

1. Take back your power: stop distracting yourself

Excessive social media, IMing, and texting, busying yourself, unnecessary errands and plans, continually getting sucked into the internet rabbit hole, restless movement, distracted socializing. Stop. For the love of yourself, stop. Turn down the volume on the blah-blah-blah go-go-go so you can hear/feel/see/be with yourself. You are with yourself 24/7, but how much of that time are you really with yourself? There is nothing more important than having a quality relationship with yourself. It’s the ground you stand on. The place you’re coming from in every part of your life. Nurture it. Take your space back.

2. Feel what you feel

If you weren’t running away from yourself, which is what distraction is, there’d be space for the rest of you to catch up. Let it. You can’t outrun your shadow or the pain of your past, so let it move up and through you. I spent two days this week in my garden crying. I was reading Patti Smith’s Just Kids and her whole evolution with becoming an artist and with Robert Maplethorpe brought up so many old emotions and fears inside me. So I put my to-do list aside and cried. It was hard and beautiful and vulnerable and deeply cathartic. Another chunk of the stuck emotional energy inside me melted and started moving. I was so grateful for the experience because I feel much more in synch with myself and lighter because of it.

3. Have the courage to set juicy goals

We do what we do to achieve certain ends. If you were to assess your life a week, month, or year from now – what would you be thrilled you had invested yourself in and achieved? Do you want to feel more confident and ease-full inside yourself? How about inspired and energized? Would you like to feel successful in your business or creativity and, if so, what exactly does that mean to you? Is there a project or personal goal you want to realize? Is there a place you feel restricted that you’d like to feel more free? Be honest with yourself and have the courage to set a juicy and specific goal. This will focus your energy and prioritize your choices. It will also bring up anything in you that’s in the way of this happening.

4. Educate yourself 

When you’re not distracted, when you’re allowing and not in resistance to yourself, when you have clear goals, your energy is lined up to move. The next piece is learning how to do your part to bring that forward. The fabulous thing about this is that others have already mastered what you are currently learning… so seek this information out and educate yourself! There is no excuse to stay stuck. Whether it’s business skills, communication skills, how to calm your mind, or how to plant a garden the information is out there. Be inquisitive and unwavering in your desire to find it. It’s the next monkey bar in your evolution forward so grab on.

5. Get to work

The more you engage your life in a quality way, the harder you work, the more you apply what you learn, the more things will flow. And that’s what you want, right, to flow into wider rivers of being, living, loving, and creating? I have lots to say about this and I’ve written more about it here and here.

6. Repeat

Daily. Weekly. Monthly. Yearly. All these cycles are happening simultaneously. Go with it. Let yourself evolve. Do the work. Be savvy and skillful about it. There’s no excuse to stay stuck.

To our glorious, serpentine evolution!

Heather -

This week has been about nothing but work, work, work and finalizing my realization of the goal I’ve had for the last four years. Nothing left but the doingness of my part of the equation, no one left to put it on, no way to side step it and turning to face the procrastination and fear that allowed me to put it off for the last few months. It’s been about being unceasingly committed to something that is hard, emotionally exhausting and removes me from the other parts of my life that I love. Then there’s the balance that occurs when my body, my mind and my emotional self literally can’t move forward another step, and the self care that steps in naturally, filling in the places that are struggling with love and reminders of why I am where I am. Mercury Retrograde will see me through the end of this part of my journey. The completion of the largest personal project of my life, aside from my kids;-)

Robin Clark -

That’s awesome! Realizing a goal always sounds soooo good on paper. But what it actually takes to do it – all the effort, emotional challenge, mental focus, discipline – etc. is gnarly. I’m so stoked for you. Next level, baby! And… let’s not forget Brian as well. 😉 xo

Heather -

Yes truly, Brian has been with me for every moment of this entire four year journey. He has been amazing and supportive. And now Rest for the weary, at least for a day or so;-)

Sara -

Great post Robin and so timely. This week in my Women’s Group we discussed the ways in which we stand between what we say we want and what we think we deserve. We started the process of unraveling our subconscious beliefs that can hold us back and more importantly actively clearing them. That’s the work–they don’t just disappear without bringing them to light and letting them go. Writing an affirmation is only the first step!
Great time to upgrade the psychic operating system.

Robin Clark -

You’re right – they don’t just disappear. You really have to crack away at it. And be patient. Sorta like playing Pick Up Sticks. Yay, growth. But wow does it feel good to clean up distorted “truths” and upgrade our operating systems and approach. Go girl! Glad to have you as a companion on the journey. xoxo!